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December 4, 2012
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The Birth of a Demon
by AxelIngleson

'Twas in the mid-most summer's night
The darkest moment ere the dawn
In stygian realms of dark delight
One beautiful to look upon
Her grace and kindness shone.

Though love was rare in that darkness
The lady with eyes a-gleaming
Took he whom she yearned to caress
To worlds from lonely dreaming.

As waves of lust and pure desire
Crashed o'er them their bodies one
In heat of night from spark to fire
The creation of a son.

A tiny newborn demon child
Who one day with grow to strive
To walk and talk in manner mild
Butler to Ciel Phantomhive
The birth of Sebastian Michaelis
:icontimelady93:
Poems are supposed to be read aloud, so I did. And I was astounded. Here's the reason:

This poem sounds wonderful, the words you've chosen are in perfect harmony. Besides that, it also has a depth that makes the reader/listener wonder where they have ended up; because it makes people disappear from our world, only to enter a fantastic, dark realm to which one can relate to as Hell due to your use of the words 'stygian realms'.

It also builds up a tension that gives the reader a wish to continue to read, which is a really important point in writing any kind of literature. Somehow, the technique in which you have created this makes me want to ask if you have been writing for a long time. It seems like it, at least.

The dark theme that flows throughout the whole poem adds the right feeling and is completed with the words 'Butler to Ciel Phantomhive' , because then we know that this particular demon is the perfect Butler.

The flow in the poem is never broken and gives the words a nice rhythm as it is being read. I can only imagine all of the dark and mysterious visions this poem has the ability to create in one's mind. In the end, it made me feel strangely happy. I do not know why, but it did.

You have made an impression that drove me to write this for you. Be proud and please, continue your writing. Thank you.
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:icon75chelsiepurple:
75ChelsiePurple Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013   General Artist
This is a wonderfully dark poem, I love the writing techniques you used. Great work :D
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:iconkaraouq:
Karaouq Featured By Owner Dec 17, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
awesome :D
Reply
:icondawnofthyembrace:
DawnOfThyEmbrace Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student Writer
Beautifully dark ! :) you're talented
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